Progress

Progress. What’s that look like? Well, it looks a bit like:

Last week. Between the new haircut, painting my toe and finger nails, and boldly leading praise & worship on Sunday by starting off acapella, I had a very “Ginilou-week”.  For those of you who don’t know, Ginilou is my mother. Of the three of my mother’s daughters, I am the one who has always embraced my Ginilou-ness much more than my other two sisters.  My mother is an original. She never follows trends, she sets them. She talks and relates to men more easily than to women. She relates to animals better than to humans. She wears cool sterling silver jewellery. And, she is the most incredibly talented woman I know. She’s also a contralto – this, obviously, makes her superior. I had no choice in embracing the contralto-thing. God just happened to make me a contralto, too.  As I say, throughout my life, I have tended to embrace, rather than rebel against, the Ginilou-ness.  But, for quite a few years certain things like the nail polish and quirky hair I have not done. That all changed last week…and, I’m all the better for it, really. Why? Why is this progress?, you ask.

Because, while all these things are very Ginilou, they are all the more very Autumn, and all the time I have not done them, I have also not been being me. I am, honestly, the most me now than I have ever been. Because, I haven’t done these things to “be like my mother”. I could no more be like my mother than be like a mongoose. This is evidenced by my lacking ability with the piano. Listen to my mother play and, from that moment on, your ears will long to hear her play, for the notes and the chords she plays will caress not just your hearing, but will imprint upon your soul. Listen to Ginilou play and you are never the same again. It is also evidenced in my lack of painting talent. Just don’t have it.  Oh, and plants thrive in her care, while over in mine they simply die. But, these other things, these are as much me as they are her. And when they are denied in any way, then something is missing. So, there’s a bit less me missing at the moment.

I’ve also made some progress in the friendship department. I think (I hope) we’re getting somewhere now, somewhere lastingly positive. 

Today was a very difficult day. Unfortunately, I really don’t have time to write about that right now. However, I must acknowledge the blessings in the midst of the frustrations – those moments of grace that made the dance bearable today. Thank you, Lord, for every one. And, knowing that progress is being made?  Well, that’s the hope and the light that keeps me dancing on.

Earcuff_2

(Ear cuff show off pic… it’s one of those cool things, and it (the ear-cuff, not the pic) was a big pick-me-up today.)

 

 

 

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